It’s as if I woke up one day and all of my senses were heightened. As I greet myself a new day arises and the cold hits the bottom of my feet as they touch the floor. The sound of the birds outside my window were louder and I’m feeling a soft stillness as the leaves fall from the tree. Everything I knew had new life to it. Excited, but not quite sure how to process this feeling of true awareness. I wondered, where did this awareness come from? How had I made it to my 30’s and just NOW feeling this?
Being fully aware of my body now, I notice my triggers and how my body responds to everything around me. Holding myself more accountable and truly being more in sync. Who am I and what is really in my heart? I NOW see the individuality within myself. I think being away from everything that I allowed to define me, forced me to be in a space to talk to God and unpack myself.
Looking at the woman I am today, has been hard to face in the mirror. This could be because the young woman behind these eyes of mine has a lot of regret and shame. So to discover my new love and appreciation for life, I have to pass the old me. In honesty, I’m not looking forward to her but I can’t look pass her anymore either.
“I am learning every day to allow the space between where I am and where I want to be to inspire me and not terrify me.” -Tracee Ellis Ross
